When I was
in Oklahoma I lived in the dust bowl. The wind blew all the time. One day in
the late fall it was so cold that the wind chill factor was way below zero.
Everything was frozen.
I was doing
homework in the dining room and looking out the window while I processed
Shakespeare. My entire clothesline was lined up with sparrows. It was so cold I
really felt sorry for them. I kept looking up and wondering what I could do for
them. They could not move much because the wind was so strong and again, it was
really cold.
I decided I
needed to go get them some birdseed so they would have something to eat at
least. This was back when I had nothing. I was going to school and working part
time. I looked around for some change and found a little over a dollar so I
headed to the closest store to buy some bird seed. I got a dollar’s worth and
came home to feed the birds. They are ground feeders so I put out a small dish
of water—fairly warm and scattered part of the seed on the ground.
I was
freezing. My eyes were watering. It was freezing on my face. I ran in the house
concerned about the poor birds. I sat in the house and read Shakespeare while I
watched the birds.
By now my
kids were involved. They were sitting at the dining table watching the birds
shiver on the line. The birds were huddled against each other in a huge long line.
Then it
happened, one fell. Jenny squealed, “Mom, one fell off.”
“No, he’s
just going to see about the food.” Was my parental reply.
But I looked
and he was just lying on the ground not moving. Another one fell and another.
I did not
know why this affected me so much but I could not stand it that these birds
were freezing and falling off the line. I was praying, "What can I do God?" I
could not leave them laying to rot (even though they could not decompose in
this cold weather, they were frozen).
I found a
shoe box, lined it with paper towels and headed outside. The little birds did
not move when I went to the clothes line. Not the ones on the line. Not the
ones on the ground. The water was frozen. The bird seed was blowing all over. I
could hardly stand up. It hurt to breathe.
I did not
even have a coat on and I was freezing. I started picking up the birds. I put
about a dozen in the box. The kids and I would bury them when the ground
thawed.
My heart was
breaking for these poor birds, my tears are freezing on my eyes, my lungs
burning with each breath, my fingers so cold they are fumbling and my heart
crying out to God for these dumb birds.
I heard the
Lord speak. It was not the bold audible voice, but it was a whisper in the
wind.
“I saw the
sparrows fall. Nothing misses my notice.”
I knew this
scripture. Maybe I only know about God and I do not really KNOW His nature.
Before I can even process this thought I hear more.
“Sally, I
see your heart for these birds. If you can feel this about the birds how much
more do you think I feel this about YOU? I know everything about you. I have
every hair on your head numbered. That doesn’t mean I know how many you have,
it mean more than that. When one falls I know how many hairs have fallen and what
number hair it is. Why do you think so little of me that you do not think I know
everything about you and love you? I love YOU. I want to do good things for
you, just like you want to help these birds. I love your tender heart Sally. Let
me care for you. Care for me.”
It was a
frozen moment in time.
The
intensity of His presence diminished and I sobbed. He loved ME. The revelation
of this was overpowering. I had known He loved mankind and therefore me; BUT He
loved ME personally. He knew EVERYTHING about me and He still loved me. I never
had to worry about anything again.
Time became
reality again, I was freezing. I snatched up all the fallen birds and ran back
to the house. My kids were still watching out the sliding door and opened it as
I approached.
This whole
thing had only taken a couple of minutes.
The kids
looked at all the dead birds. Jen cried. Then we put the lid on it, talked
about where to bury them later and they went back to playing a game at the
table while I went back to Shakespeare.
In the midst
of memorizing prose I heard some weird noise in the kitchen. I ignored it but
it kept on and eventually irritated me so I go up to go see what it was. The
box of dead birds was making a noise. I could not figure out what it was…I took
off the lid. (Obviously I did not think this through first.)
When I
lifted off the lid to see what the noise was a dozen sparrows flew to
freedom—at least as much freedom as they could get within my house.
Total chaos
ensued. I was yelling for the kids to get the bedroom doors closed. I was
running around trying to catch them. I realized this was totally futile. I did
not want any of them to get hurt. Then they started flying into the picture
window. I hollered for Jason to open the front door and I opened the sliding
door—next I got a dish towel and we started “shooing” the birds outside.
The 3 of us
were laughing so hard it was hilarious. We got all the birds out uninjured.
Having both doors open for 15 minutes in a freezing windstorm meant the house
was REALLY cold. We flopped in the living room floor and laughed over and over.
We talked about actually thinking before we did things—like bringing birds into
the house and then taking the lid off the box. Ok, I was the one who caused it
all but there was no reason they shouldn’t learn what mess a person can make of
things if they do not think things through.
I got some
rubber gloves and started cleaning up all the evidence of the birds. The kids
started cleaning up feathers.
I felt time
stop again. I knew He was right there. I listened and heard him say, “You
thought the birds were dead. So many times you see something that looks dead and you believe
what you see. Let me show you the unseen. Even if something appears dead, cover
it in intercession, allow it to warm up, bring it into the realm of your love
in prayer, and watch me bring it to life. I will bring you things that appear
tough. Your tender heart and strong love combined with intercession will change
lives. Let me care for you. Care for me.”
It is a
crazy supernatural life and I love it.
Time to pray.
